I'm Looking Through You (Where Did You Go?)
by kymm
Summary: 5th Season Janeway short-short story. I really can't say too much without giving away the story. Based on a Beatles song. Oh, and it has a little J/C. Have a nice day!


I'm Looking Through You (Where Did You Go?) 

Disclaimer: Paramount owns them, I'm just using them. Using them! That's right! Ha ha. The Beatles own the song "I'm Looking Through You". 

Summary: Just a very short J/C thing set in the 5th season. Might give it away if I say more. Just keep in mind "5TH SEASON JANEWAY 5TH SEASON JANEWAY" when you read this. 

Note: I'm on a Beatles kick again. The last time it was this bad was when I was 10. It was bad when I was 8, too. I just felt like saying that. ô_ô

__

I'm looking through you, where did you go?  
I thought I knew you, what did I know?  
You don't look different, but you have changed  
I'm looking through you, you're not the same (--The Beatles, "I'm Looking Through You") 

I looked at her. She was sitting on the opposite side of the messhall from me, staring out the view port. Before recently, he had not known her to be quite as antisocial. Granted, she stayed in her quarters a lot, but it didn't used to be like this. This was not the person he used to know. 

Everyone else knew it, also. It wasn't like he was the only one. Tom Paris had made the comment to him. It wasn't a comment; it was more of a question, concerning her personal well being. 

"Do you know what's wrong with her, Chakotay?" 

"I wish I did." 

Or, perhaps there was nothing wrong with her. She might have just wanted time to herself. 

He shot that idea down immediately. There was definitely something wrong. Maybe he should figure out what that was. 

He was her friend, after all. 

* * * * 

He walked over to her table. It was a quiet, secluded corner – it was depressing. She wasn't staring out the view port; she was reading a PADD. 

"Interesting?" he asked. He was referring to the PADD. 

"Oh, yes. Reports from engineering from Ensign Vorik are always most interesting." She said, obviously sarcastic. 

"Really? Perhaps I should try reading them sometime." He replied, hoping to get an old reaction out of her. Perhaps Laughter? Surely he would at least get a smile. 

He didn't. "Perhaps you should." She said bitterly. 

He sighed. "Kathryn, what's wrong with you?" he asked. 

"There's absolutely _nothing _wrong with me. I'm just trying to get some work done. Why is it, Chakotay, that whenever I try to get some work done, that there's _always _something wrong with me?" she snapped.

"Kathryn, this has absolutely nothing to do with it –." 

"With what? I thought there was something wrong with me." She said coolly. 

"There is. There is something going on. You are not the same person I used to know." Chakotay snapped back at her. "I thought I was your friend. I'm merely trying to help you." 

She laughed. It wasn't the same laugh he used to know. It was a bitter, hoarse laugh. "I don't know what you're referring to. I'm the same person you always knew…am I not? I'm Kathryn Janeway. So, you're going to have to be more clear." 

He scratched his head, and sighed. "All right. How about last week? How about B'Elanna? What about giving permission to operate on her without her permission?" 

"She would have died." She snarled. 

"That's not the point. She didn't give you her permission. It wasn't right." He replied. 

"With all due respect to you and B'Elanna, it was a Cardassian _hologram. _Not the real thing."

"Using their techniques, Kathryn. This is a battle you can't win." 

She shook her head. "Who says this is a battle? It was a call, for the well being of my chief engineer." 

He found that he was the one getting angry, not the one trying to help. "It wasn't your call to make." He snapped back at her. 

His remark was followed by a dead silence. Kathryn had thrown the PADD on the table, and was looking out the view port in a furious silence. 

__

Your lips are moving, I cannot hear  
Your voice is soothing, but the words aren't clear  
You don't sound different, I've learned the game  
I'm looking through you, you're not the same 

He turned to her. "You're right." He concluded. 

She raised an eyebrow. "Am I?' 

"Yes. _This _is a battle I cannot win." 

If at all possible, her eyebrow shot up even farther. "I'm afraid I don't know what you mean." 

"I looking through you; you're not the same." He said quietly. With that, he left the now empty messhall, laving her in his wake. 

THE END 

__

Questions? Comments? Marriage proposals? Well, mail them all to [me_myself_and_gollum@hotmail.com][1]__

   [1]: mailto:me_myself_and_gollum@hotmail.com



End file.
